Bloodhound Gang

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I was lonelier than Kunta Kinte at a Merle Haggard concert
That night I strolled on into Uncle Limpy's Hump Palace lookin' for love.
It had been a while.
In fact, three hundred and sixty-five had come and went
since that midnight run haulin' hog to Shakey Town on I-10.
I had picked up this hitchhiker that was sweatin' gallons
through a pair of Daisy Duke cut-offs and one of those Fruit Of The Loom tank-tops.
Well, that night I lost myself to ruby red lips,
milky white skin and baby blue eyes.
name was Russell.


Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Well I find it's quite a thrill
When she grinds me against her will
Yes a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'


Well, faster than you can say, "shallow grave",
this pretty little thing come up to me and starts kneadin' my balls
like hard-boiled eggs in a tube sock.
Said her name was Bambi and I said, "Well that's a coincidence darlin',
‘cause I was just thinkin' about skinnin' you like a deer."
Well she smiled, had about as much teeth as a Jack-O-Lantern,
and I went on to tell her how I would wear her face like a mask
as I do my little kooky dance.
And then she told me to shush.
I guess she could sense my desperation.
‘Course, it's hard to hide a hard-on when you're dressed like Minnie Pearl.


Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Well I find it's quite a thrill
When she grinds me against her will
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'


So, Bambi's goin' on about how she can make all my fantasies come true.
So I says, "Even this one I have where Jesus Christ
is jackhammering Mickey Mouse in the doo-doo hole
with a lawn dart as Garth Brooks gives birth to something
resembling a cheddar cheese log with almonds on Santa Claus's tummy-tum?"
Well, ten beers, twenty minutes and thirty dollars later
I'm parkin' the beef bus in tuna town if you know what I mean.
Got the nailer back at her trailer.
Heh. That rhymes.
I have to admit it was even more of a turn-on
when I found out she was doin' me to buy baby formula.


Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Well I find it's quite a thrill
When she grinds me against her will
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'


Day or so had passed when I popped the clutch,
gave the tranny a spin and slid on into
The Stinky Pinky Gulp N' Guzzle Big Rig Snooze-A-Stop.
There I was browsin' through the latest issue of "Throb",
when I saw Bambi starin' at me from the back of a milk carton.
Well, my heart just dropped.
So, I decided to do what any good Christian would.
You can not imagine how difficult it is to hold a half gallon of moo juice
and polish the one-eyed gopher when your doin' seventy-five
in an eighteen-wheeler.
I never thought missing children could be so sexy.
Did I say that out loud?


Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Well I find it's quite a thrill
When she grinds me against her will
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'

This speech is my recital
I think it's very vital
To rock a rhyme
That's right on time
It's tricky tricky yo here we go

It's tricky to rock a rhyme
To rock a rhyme that's right on time
It's tricky tricky tricky tricky tricky tricky

It's tricky to rock a rhyme
To rock a rhyme that's right on time
It's tricky tricky tricky tricky tricky tricky

I met this little girlie, her hair was kind of curly
Went to her house to bust her out, I had to leave real early
These girls are really sleazy, all they just say is please me
Or spend some time and rock a rhyme, I said it's not that easy

It's tricky to rock a rhyme
To rock a rhyme that's right on time
It's tricky tricky tricky tricky tricky tricky
It's tricky to rock a rhyme
To rock a rhyme that's right on time
It's tricky tricky tricky tricky tricky tricky

In New York the people talk and try to make us rhyme
They really hawk, but we just walk, because we have no time
And in the city it's a pity, 'cause we just can't hide
Tinted windows don't mean nothing, they know who's inside

It's tricky to rock a rhyme
To rock a rhyme that's right on time
It's tricky tricky tricky tricky tricky tricky
It's tricky to rock a rhyme
To rock a rhyme that's right on time
It's tricky tricky tricky tricky tricky tricky

When I wake up people take up mostly all of my time
I'm not singing, phone keep ringing so I make up a rhyme
I'm not bragging, people nagging, 'cause they think I'm a star
Always tearing what I'm wearing, I think they're going too far
A girl named Tara follows Jared every gig we play
Evil dissed her and dismissed her, now she's jocking Spanky
I ain't lying, girls be crying, 'cause we're on TV
They even bother my poor father, 'cause he's down with me

It's tricky to rock a rhyme
To rock a rhyme that's right on time
It's tricky tricky tricky tricky tricky tricky
It's tricky to rock a rhyme
To rock a rhyme that's right on time
It's tricky tricky tricky tricky tricky tricky

We are not dumb, we don't use drugs, but you assume on your own
They offer coke and lots of dope, but we just leave it alone
It's like that y'all, but we don't quit
You keep on, rock shot, 'cause this is it

You came twice last year like a Sears catalog
Cause your last boyfriend makes love like Boss Hogg
Well now you're seeing me but soon I'll have you seeing God
Cause girl I'll get you panting like you're Pavlov's dog
Like a DC-10: guaranteed to go down
But baby your black box is the one that I found
I'll give you the gift that keeps on givin' it won't cost you any money
Then she grabbed me by the ears and said kiss me where it smells funny

So down I go like I'm 2000 Flushes
I can tell I'm doing something right by the way that she blushes
She's one that's speechless, I'm the one that's tongue tied
She's thinking holy mackerel I'm thinking tuna on the side
There must be something wrong with Al Pacino's nose
Cause the scent of a woman is like rotten tomatoes
Yeah I'm snorkeling for clams and it doesn't matter if I wanna be
Don't come up for air until you kiss me where it smells funny

Drop my face below her waist and stay on third base
I can tell that the cherry's ripe by the way it tastes
Yeah I could make a lot of wine with the yeast I find inside her panties
And then drink it while eating out down at the Seafood Shanty
Drop my face below her waist and stay on third base
I can tell that the cherry's ripe by the way it tastes
Yeah I could make a lot of wine with the yeast I find inside her panties
And then drink it while eating out down at the Seafood Shanty

You came twice last year like a Sears catalog
Cause your last boyfriend makes love like Boss Hogg
Well now you're seeing me but soon I'll have you seeing God
Cause girl I'll get you panting like you're Pavlov's dog
Like a DC-10: guaranteed to go down
But baby your black box is the one that I found
I'll give you the gift that keeps on givin' it won't cost you any money
Then she grabbed me by the ears and said kiss me where it smells funny

So down I go like I'm 2000 Flushes
I can tell I'm doing something right by the way that she blushes
She's one that's speechless, I'm the one that's tongue tied
She's thinking holy mackerel I'm thinking tuna on the side
There must be something wrong with Al Pacino's nose
Cause the scent of a woman is like rotten tomatoes
Yeah I'm snorkeling for clams and it doesn't matter if I wanna be
Don't come up for air until you kiss me where it smells funny

Drop my face below her waist and stay on third base
I can tell that the cherry's ripe by the way it tastes
Yeah I could make a lot of wine with the yeast I find inside her panties
And then drink it while eating out down at the Seafood Shanty
Drop my face below her waist and stay on third base
I can tell that the cherry's ripe by the way it tastes
Yeah I could make a lot of wine with the yeast I find inside her panties
And then drink it while eating out down at the Seafood Shanty

Roll the fuckin' tape back and let's try it again.
This time more sloppy, like childbirth.
Where's me fuckin' bass guitar?

Everybody look around hear the sound
Somethin' special's gonna come your way
We got somethin' new that is true
We got somethin' just for you today

All around the nation
Whoa
We're the new sensation
Have you heard?
Have you heard?
Have you heard?

We're K.I.D.S. Incorporated
K.I.D.S. yeah
K.I.D.S. Incorporated
K.I.D.S.
Whoa
Look's like we made it
We're K.I.D.S. Incorporated

In the city in the street there's a beat
There's a feeling that you can't deny
All the people wanna move wanna groove
There's a sign of spirit in their eyes

All around the nation
Whoa
We're the new sensation
Have you heard?
Have you heard?
Have you heard?

We're K.I.D.S. Incorporated
K.I.D.S. yeah
K.I.D.S. Incorporated
K.I.D.S.
Whoa
Look's like we made it
We're K.I.D.S. Incorporated

K.I.D.S.
K.I.D.S. Incorporated
We're gonna have fun
K.I.D.S.
K.I.D.S. Incorporated
For everyone

All around the nation
We're the new sensation
Have you heard?
Have you heard?
Have you heard?

We're K.I.D.S. Incorporated
K.I.D.S. yeah
K.I.D.S. Incorporated
K.I.D.S.
Whoa
Look's like we made it
We're K.I.D.S. Incorporated
What?
Looks like we made it
We're K.I.D.S. Incorporated

Alright, where's me smack?

Roll the fuckin' tape back and let's try it again.
This time more sloppy, like childbirth.
Where's me fuckin' bass guitar?

Everybody look around hear the sound
Somethin' special's gonna come your way
We got somethin' new that is true
We got somethin' just for you today

All around the nation
Whoa
We're the new sensation
Have you heard?
Have you heard?
Have you heard?

We're K.I.D.S. Incorporated
K.I.D.S. yeah
K.I.D.S. Incorporated
K.I.D.S.
Whoa
Look's like we made it
We're K.I.D.S. Incorporated

In the city in the street there's a beat
There's a feeling that you can't deny
All the people wanna move wanna groove
There's a sign of spirit in their eyes

All around the nation
Whoa
We're the new sensation
Have you heard?
Have you heard?
Have you heard?

We're K.I.D.S. Incorporated
K.I.D.S. yeah
K.I.D.S. Incorporated
K.I.D.S.
Whoa
Look's like we made it
We're K.I.D.S. Incorporated

K.I.D.S.
K.I.D.S. Incorporated
We're gonna have fun
K.I.D.S.
K.I.D.S. Incorporated
For everyone

All around the nation
We're the new sensation
Have you heard?
Have you heard?
Have you heard?

We're K.I.D.S. Incorporated
K.I.D.S. yeah
K.I.D.S. Incorporated
K.I.D.S.
Whoa
Look's like we made it
We're K.I.D.S. Incorporated
What?
Looks like we made it
We're K.I.D.S. Incorporated

Alright, where's me smack?

If your ass is a Chinese restaurant I'll have the poo-poo platter
My friend Jerry Vandergrift kissed me in Home Ec. class
Later in the afternoon some jarheads in the locker room kicked my ass
I said guys I'm like you I like Monster Trucks too
Wanna see how many push-ups I can do?
I just wish I was queer so I could get
Chicks dig guys that are
Queer guys that don't dig
Chicks that don't dig guys like me
See I'm not queer I'm too ugly
But if I were handsome just imagine how great it would be
Incognito as gay though but not actually that way though pseudo homo phony
Maybe it's a stupid theory or maybe just stupidity
But if I was a queerbee in the fashion industry
Scoring with a super model would be easy
Cause 'super model' means voluptuous but is also is synonomous with 'super dumb'
Ya see I'd be a good listener so she'd treat me like a sister and soon I'd become
That trusted friend that cares that rubs her back and braids her hair
No it wouldn't take a week before I'm in her underwear
I wish I was queer so I could get
Chicks dig guys that are
Queer guys that don't dig
Chicks that don't dig guys like me
See I'm not queer I'm too ugly
Doesn't matter what I'm packin' in my denim it's what's in my genes
The only smoked meat the only sausage I would eat is made by Jimmy Dean
See I'm not to keen on the smell of Vaseline
No I'm not Princess Di and I don't wanna be a queen
I just wish I was queer so I could get chicks

Anyway if I were gay I'd have to change my name to Dirk or Lewis
Hang out with my mom's hair stylist his name is Kip he's got a lisp he talks like this
And wear my mother's lingerie learn the songs of Broadway
And appreciate Depeche Mode and avant garde ballet
I wish I was queer so I could get
Chicks dig guys that are
Queer guys that don't dig
Chicks dig guys that are
Queer guys that don't dig
Chicks dig guys that are
Queer guys that don't dig
Chicks that don't dig guys like me
See I'm not queer I'm too ugly
And I don't shave my heiny
Don't shave my heiny
See I'm not queer I'm too ugly

And I don't shave my heiny
Don't shave my heiny
See I'm not queer I'm too ugly

And I don't shave my heiny
Don't shave my heiny
See I'm not queer I'm too ugly

Ashes to ashes and funks to funky
Daddy Long Legs is a mean ass honky
And Jimmy Pop ain't no heiny hobbit gaybe
Ain't no big meaty chunks in my thick brown gravy
Cause I'm a Loch Ness a Loch Ness a Loch Ness monster
Jerry's Kids are knockin' at my door, "Could you be a sponsor?"
Tiny Bubbles in my tub pull my finger Lawrence Welk
If you wanna look like Rocky Dennis better drink your milk
When I'm feeling Oriental I gotta rub my chin
I'm gonna hold my water in like I'm Gunga Din
So have a taste of my bass cause the girlies got smiles
You get on my case like the Rockford Files
Crazy Eddie in the slammer cause he's giving it all away
John Boy in the barn with a horse in the hay
No rhyme no reason no job no class
And we don't go near the ghetto cause they'd shoot our ass

Go go yeah yeah huh what?
I'm a legend in my spare time

If you ain't ever been to the suburbs
Don't you ever come to the suburbs
Cause you wouldn't understand the suburbs
Cause I'm a huskin' a huskin' a huskin' your corn
I'm as deep as a plot to a gay porn
So Uh-Oh Spaghettios I forgot to hide away the body
I know that she's a hotty but damn that girl could party
So come to me momma it ain't no crime
I'm a skilled love doctor growlin', "What's your sign?"
Did the Flamin' Waffle with Ho Chi Min
Your girl's a dollar bill 'cause we don't know where she's been
J.F.K.'s head's a puzzle and your woman needs a muzzle
Barbara Eden in the bottle and now i'm gonna guzzle
You're too what? Shy shy huh what?
Hush hush yea? I knew why
Cause we're playing the Palladium can't get on Star Search
Daddy Legs standing tall he can do the Funky Lurch
And Jimmy Jimmy Pop is short for Jimmy Jimmy Popular
You know I know you know your not the tough guy that I thought you were

Go go yeah yeah huh what?
I'm a legend in my spare time

Cause I wopbobaloobop
Ha cha cha chatch
Come lick my balls
Vive la my crotch

Cause your daddy thinks I'm lazy your momma thinks I'm crazy
But neither of them know that you are carrying my baby
And I'm the Amos I'm the Andy I'm the sticky Aunt Jemammy
I gave you mouth to mouth like Resuscitation Annie
It takes two of us to do this like Dean Martin Jerry Lewis
And your throat is swollen gloryholen' ya blew us
George Burns' pacemaker beats steady slow and low
That's why we got more hits then a dealer at a Dead show

Go go yeah yeah huh what?
I'm a legend in my spare time

Ashes to ashes and funks to funky
Daddy Long Legs is a mean ass honky
And Jimmy Pop ain't no heiny hobbit gaybe
Ain't no big meaty chunks in my thick brown gravy
Cause I'm a Loch Ness a Loch Ness a Loch Ness monster
Jerry's Kids are knockin' at my door, "Could you be a sponsor?"
Tiny Bubbles in my tub pull my finger Lawrence Welk
If you wanna look like Rocky Dennis better drink your milk
When I'm feeling Oriental I gotta rub my chin
I'm gonna hold my water in like I'm Gunga Din
So have a taste of my bass cause the girlies got smiles
You get on my case like the Rockford Files
Crazy Eddie in the slammer cause he's giving it all away
John Boy in the barn with a horse in the hay
No rhyme no reason no job no class
And we don't go near the ghetto cause they'd shoot our ass

Go go yeah yeah huh what?
I'm a legend in my spare time

If you ain't ever been to the suburbs
Don't you ever come to the suburbs
Cause you wouldn't understand the suburbs
Cause I'm a huskin' a huskin' a huskin' your corn
I'm as deep as a plot to a gay porn
So Uh-Oh Spaghettios I forgot to hide away the body
I know that she's a hotty but damn that girl could party
So come to me momma it ain't no crime
I'm a skilled love doctor growlin', "What's your sign?"
Did the Flamin' Waffle with Ho Chi Min
Your girl's a dollar bill 'cause we don't know where she's been
J.F.K.'s head's a puzzle and your woman needs a muzzle
Barbara Eden in the bottle and now i'm gonna guzzle
You're too what? Shy shy huh what?
Hush hush yea? I knew why
Cause we're playing the Palladium can't get on Star Search
Daddy Legs standing tall he can do the Funky Lurch
And Jimmy Jimmy Pop is short for Jimmy Jimmy Popular
You know I know you know your not the tough guy that I thought you were

Go go yeah yeah huh what?
I'm a legend in my spare time

Cause I wopbobaloobop
Ha cha cha chatch
Come lick my balls
Vive la my crotch

Cause your daddy thinks I'm lazy your momma thinks I'm crazy
But neither of them know that you are carrying my baby
And I'm the Amos I'm the Andy I'm the sticky Aunt Jemammy
I gave you mouth to mouth like Resuscitation Annie
It takes two of us to do this like Dean Martin Jerry Lewis
And your throat is swollen gloryholen' ya blew us
George Burns' pacemaker beats steady slow and low
That's why we got more hits then a dealer at a Dead show

Go go yeah yeah huh what?
I'm a legend in my spare time

Why try? I'm that guy
Holden Caulfield from "Catcher In The Rye"
Put away ‘cause he wasn't all there
Like a jigsaw puzzle you might compare
Me to him not a liver but wurst
Been much better off as a still birth
Big let down unparalleled
Like the last episode of "Seinfeld"
Or Jack Lemmon in "Glengarry Glen Ross"
Pepsi Challenge took it lost
Just fizzed out with my wires crossed
Buttons pushed but never went off
Like Martha I will self-destruct
The name's Dunnstock it's not Dumptruck
Just cursed as fuck with no such luck
My future plans include not much

Never gonna be never gonna be never gonna never gonna be
Nothin' more than me
Never gonna be never gonna be never gonna never gonna be
Nothin' more than me
Never gonna be never gonna be never gonna never gonna be
Nothin' more than me
Always gonna be always gonna be always gonna always gonna be
Most likely to suck

Wanna be a Ghostbuster
First black President, owner of "Hustler"
Got shot down like Larry Flynt
Felt like shit like a bowel movement
Have you seen my will to live?
Because I seem to have lost it
Lovelife? No but Mom thinks I'm handsome
Couldn't get off if I held a pimp for ransom
Feel like Jimmy Stewart no one sees my Harvey
Toxic Shock Syndrome gets more girls than me
Like Pee Wee Herman spermin' I can
See the future in the palm of my hand
Psychic Friends, Network loser
Large phone bill in my very near future
Dealt nothing and bluffing hard
Playing poker with a joker and some Uno cards

Never gonna be never gonna be never gonna never gonna be
Nothin' more than me
Never gonna be never gonna be never gonna never gonna be
Nothin' more than me
Never gonna be never gonna be never gonna never gonna be
Nothin' more than me
Always gonna be always gonna be always gonna always gonna be
Most likely to suck

Most likely to suck
Most likely to suck
Most likely to suck
Most likely to suck
Most likely to suck

Why try? I'm that guy
Holden Caulfield from "Catcher In The Rye"
Put away ‘cause he wasn't all there
Like a jigsaw puzzle you might compare
Me to him not a liver but wurst
Been much better off as a still birth
Big let down unparalleled
Like the last episode of "Seinfeld"
Or Jack Lemmon in "Glengarry Glen Ross"
Pepsi Challenge took it lost
Just fizzed out with my wires crossed
Buttons pushed but never went off
Like Martha I will self-destruct
The name's Dunnstock it's not Dumptruck
Just cursed as fuck with no such luck
My future plans include not much

Never gonna be never gonna be never gonna never gonna be
Nothin' more than me
Never gonna be never gonna be never gonna never gonna be
Nothin' more than me
Never gonna be never gonna be never gonna never gonna be
Nothin' more than me
Always gonna be always gonna be always gonna always gonna be
Most likely to suck

Wanna be a Ghostbuster
First black President, owner of "Hustler"
Got shot down like Larry Flynt
Felt like shit like a bowel movement
Have you seen my will to live?
Because I seem to have lost it
Lovelife? No but Mom thinks I'm handsome
Couldn't get off if I held a pimp for ransom
Feel like Jimmy Stewart no one sees my Harvey
Toxic Shock Syndrome gets more girls than me
Like Pee Wee Herman spermin' I can
See the future in the palm of my hand
Psychic Friends, Network loser
Large phone bill in my very near future
Dealt nothing and bluffing hard
Playing poker with a joker and some Uno cards

Never gonna be never gonna be never gonna never gonna be
Nothin' more than me
Never gonna be never gonna be never gonna never gonna be
Nothin' more than me
Never gonna be never gonna be never gonna never gonna be
Nothin' more than me
Always gonna be always gonna be always gonna always gonna be
Most likely to suck

Most likely to suck
Most likely to suck
Most likely to suck
Most likely to suck
Most likely to suck

We gonna drop this next bomb for a money makin' playa that ain't with us no mo.
Yeah, Notorious B.I.G.
Hell no, we gonna do this for a gangbanging thug that never seen it comin'.
Yeah, Tupac Shakur.
Nah bitch, I'm talkin' ‘bout motherfuckin' Falco and shit.
What? Falco?

O0o0o Rock me Amadeus
O0o0o Rock me Amadeus
O0o0o Rock me Amadeus
O0o0o Rock me Amadeus

Tried to O.D. on the Cold-Eeze
"Golden Girls" got me "Sweatin' To The Oldies"
Hanging out like Double Ds, sip Long Island Iced Teas
Wrote to Mayor McCheese "Send a Shamrock Shake please!"
Three O' Clock on the dot, time to cruise for Eighth graders
Rather tape the Weather Channel so that I can watch it later
Reruns of Rerun so "What's Happening?"
Dee's knocked up and Rog on crack again
Deep throat a whole Nutty Buddy
Make whoopie to a batch of Silly Putty
Make a Spam and Colgate sandwich and ate it
Go through "National Geographic" and draw panties on the natives
So I like to dance naked in front of my pets
But my cat was inattentive so I sent him U.P.S.
Playin' spin the bottle with my mom
I watch "Cops" with no pants on

Must've blown a fuse nothing's going on
Lamer than the Pope climb the walls like King Kong
Buggin' out like Tori Spelling's eyes
Deader than the parents on a "Party of Five"
Luciano Pavoratti on a treadmill
Not going nowhere slim chance we will
Less hip than Bo Jackson bored like wood
Dick around like Frankie Goes To Hollywood

Relax don't do it when you wanna go to it
Relax don't do it when you wanna cum
Relax don't do it when you wanna go to it
Relax don't do it when you wanna cum

Nowhere to go I can't wake up late
Just sit around and wait for my "Old Spice" to activate
Stalemate jailbait in "My So-Called Life" imprisonment
Amazing what a good breakfast pickles make isn't it?
I like to pretend I'm speed reading
Never lose the sight of the thrill of sneezing
Don't need a shower today just some Brut by "Faberge
Smell the ass of my jeans clean they'll do another day
And I recycle I sniff my own farts
I dial the wrong number hope a conversation starts
I mean I might as well be listenin' to Journey
Givin' myself a mullet hook the Flowbee to the Kirby
Make a prank call pretendin' I'm a mime
Get stuck in traffic just to pass the time
Sent a letter in the mail in Braille to Johnny Quest
Send me back my Etch-A-Sketch

Must've blown, a fuse nothing's going on
Lamer than the Pope, climb the walls like King Kong
Buggin' out like Tori Spelling's eyes
Deader than the parents on a "Party of Five"
Luciano Pavoratti on a treadmill
Not going nowhere slim chance we will
Less hip than Bo Jackson, bored like wood
Dick around like Frankie Goes To Hollywood

Relax don't do it when you wanna go to it
Relax don't do it when you wanna cum
Relax don't do it when you wanna go to it
Relax don't do it when you wanna cum

I'm mighty tighty whitey and I'm smugglin' plums
When you wanna cum
I'm mighty tighty whitey and I'm smugglin' plums
When you wanna cum
I'm mighty tighty whitey and I'm smugglin' plums
When you wanna cum
I'm mighty tighty whitey and I'm smugglin' plums
When you wanna cum


Yo yo yo yo yo! What it is motherfuckers?
Aw shit, here comes Pac-Man.
Hey Pac-Man, what's up?
Me you bitches! I'm high on crack! Wanna freebase?
No Pac-Man drugs are bad!
Nope can't help you man.
Pussies. Whoa! Holy shit!

Must've blown a fuse, nothing's going on
Lamer than the Pope, climb the walls like King Kong
Buggin' out like Tori Spelling's eyes
Deader than the parents on a "Party of Five"
Luciano Pavoratti on a treadmill
Not going nowhere slim chance we will
Less hip than Bo Jackson bored like wood
Dick around like Frankie Goes To Hollywood

Relax don't do it when you wanna go to it
Relax don't do it when you wanna cum
Relax don't do it when you wanna go to it
Relax don't do it when you wanna cum

Holy macaroni
Holy macaroni
Holy macaroni
Holy macaroni

We gonna drop this next bomb for a money makin' playa that ain't with us no mo.
Yeah, Notorious B.I.G.
Hell no, we gonna do this for a gangbanging thug that never seen it comin'.
Yeah, Tupac Shakur.
Nah bitch, I'm talkin' ‘bout motherfuckin' Falco and shit.
What? Falco?

O0o0o Rock me Amadeus
O0o0o Rock me Amadeus
O0o0o Rock me Amadeus
O0o0o Rock me Amadeus

Tried to O.D. on the Cold-Eeze
"Golden Girls" got me "Sweatin' To The Oldies"
Hanging out like Double Ds, sip Long Island Iced Teas
Wrote to Mayor McCheese "Send a Shamrock Shake please!"
Three O' Clock on the dot, time to cruise for Eighth graders
Rather tape the Weather Channel so that I can watch it later
Reruns of Rerun so "What's Happening?"
Dee's knocked up and Rog on crack again
Deep throat a whole Nutty Buddy
Make whoopie to a batch of Silly Putty
Make a Spam and Colgate sandwich and ate it
Go through "National Geographic" and draw panties on the natives
So I like to dance naked in front of my pets
But my cat was inattentive so I sent him U.P.S.
Playin' spin the bottle with my mom
I watch "Cops" with no pants on

Must've blown a fuse nothing's going on
Lamer than the Pope climb the walls like King Kong
Buggin' out like Tori Spelling's eyes
Deader than the parents on a "Party of Five"
Luciano Pavoratti on a treadmill
Not going nowhere slim chance we will
Less hip than Bo Jackson bored like wood
Dick around like Frankie Goes To Hollywood

Relax don't do it when you wanna go to it
Relax don't do it when you wanna cum
Relax don't do it when you wanna go to it
Relax don't do it when you wanna cum

Nowhere to go I can't wake up late
Just sit around and wait for my "Old Spice" to activate
Stalemate jailbait in "My So-Called Life" imprisonment
Amazing what a good breakfast pickles make isn't it?
I like to pretend I'm speed reading
Never lose the sight of the thrill of sneezing
Don't need a shower today just some Brut by "Faberge
Smell the ass of my jeans clean they'll do another day
And I recycle I sniff my own farts
I dial the wrong number hope a conversation starts
I mean I might as well be listenin' to Journey
Givin' myself a mullet hook the Flowbee to the Kirby
Make a prank call pretendin' I'm a mime
Get stuck in traffic just to pass the time
Sent a letter in the mail in Braille to Johnny Quest
Send me back my Etch-A-Sketch

Must've blown, a fuse nothing's going on
Lamer than the Pope, climb the walls like King Kong
Buggin' out like Tori Spelling's eyes
Deader than the parents on a "Party of Five"
Luciano Pavoratti on a treadmill
Not going nowhere slim chance we will
Less hip than Bo Jackson, bored like wood
Dick around like Frankie Goes To Hollywood

Relax don't do it when you wanna go to it
Relax don't do it when you wanna cum
Relax don't do it when you wanna go to it
Relax don't do it when you wanna cum

I'm mighty tighty whitey and I'm smugglin' plums
When you wanna cum
I'm mighty tighty whitey and I'm smugglin' plums
When you wanna cum
I'm mighty tighty whitey and I'm smugglin' plums
When you wanna cum
I'm mighty tighty whitey and I'm smugglin' plums
When you wanna cum


Yo yo yo yo yo! What it is motherfuckers?
Aw shit, here comes Pac-Man.
Hey Pac-Man, what's up?
Me you bitches! I'm high on crack! Wanna freebase?
No Pac-Man drugs are bad!
Nope can't help you man.
Pussies. Whoa! Holy shit!

Must've blown a fuse, nothing's going on
Lamer than the Pope, climb the walls like King Kong
Buggin' out like Tori Spelling's eyes
Deader than the parents on a "Party of Five"
Luciano Pavoratti on a treadmill
Not going nowhere slim chance we will
Less hip than Bo Jackson bored like wood
Dick around like Frankie Goes To Hollywood

Relax don't do it when you wanna go to it
Relax don't do it when you wanna cum
Relax don't do it when you wanna go to it
Relax don't do it when you wanna cum

Holy macaroni
Holy macaroni
Holy macaroni
Holy macaroni

It goes one two three when I'm kicking the funky lyrics
I'm busting up vocabulary I want you all to hear it
I'm busting up the rhythm 'cause I'm busting up the rhyme
I'm kicking down the stop posts cause I wanna kicks the time
I'm digging down some knowledge cause you know I never hide it
When i'm pulling down your panties 'cause I want to get inside it
Like a boa a boa a boa constrictor
Gonna drop off your drawers shoot straight for your sphincter
I could roll my rhymes but I would be faking
Jimmy Jimmy Pop is not Jamaican
J I double M Y Pop go
I run the show like Don Pardo
With a Bugaloo Bee on the beboo tip
My hit will make you trip cause I'm quadradipped
I'll do the Popeye Pluto I'll freak the funkfazooto
Not Latino what I mean though fuzzy dice like Menudo
Rubber baby buggy's bumpers
Punky's Brewsters now I hump her
With my itsy bitsy teeny weenie shrunken small white peenie
So rinse spit swallow brain blank kinda hollow
Not to deep leap wow oh kinda shallow
Cause we're in your face like Ed Gein
Purple rain purple rain

Mama say mama sa mama cu sa
Mama say mama sa mama cu sa

Naughty by nature and white by choice
And the sound of my voice makes your panties moist
Cause I'm finger lickin' happy like a gay proctologist
So like a dyke with hollow tits I'll rip the mike with hollow tips
Yeah he's in control like Sherman Potter
And I got more balls then the Harlem Globetrotters
Jimmy Pop Jimmy Pop rah rah rah
Mama say mama sa mama cu sa
Now I'm floating out your pipes like a Village People sump pump
I always take a swallow cause you know I never get enough
So batter up Bruce Banner if you think you're going to measure up
You can't be the top dog gotta be the Scooby Pup
Step to the bass drum always gotta have fun
If you add two halves you'll always get the total sum
My steps are correct and my mike is always checked
And when a punk is in effect you know he's gonna get wrecked
I don't want to start no blasphemous rumors
But I think that Sinbad's got a lousy sense of humor
Little children unattended better get my poison candy
Don't care about y'all as long as we feel dandy
And I get the poon from Judy Blume
Mr Hooper's dead so why don't you give me his broom
So come on chickey baby let's go make some noise
What? No I'm not the guy from the Beastie Boys

Mama say mama sa mama cu sa
Mama say mama sa mama cu sa

It goes one two three when I'm kicking the funky lyrics
I'm busting up vocabulary I want you all to hear it
I'm busting up the rhythm 'cause I'm busting up the rhyme
I'm kicking down the stop posts cause I wanna kicks the time
I'm digging down some knowledge cause you know I never hide it
When i'm pulling down your panties 'cause I want to get inside it
Like a boa a boa a boa constrictor
Gonna drop off your drawers shoot straight for your sphincter
I could roll my rhymes but I would be faking
Jimmy Jimmy Pop is not Jamaican
J I double M Y Pop go
I run the show like Don Pardo
With a Bugaloo Bee on the beboo tip
My hit will make you trip cause I'm quadradipped
I'll do the Popeye Pluto I'll freak the funkfazooto
Not Latino what I mean though fuzzy dice like Menudo
Rubber baby buggy's bumpers
Punky's Brewsters now I hump her
With my itsy bitsy teeny weenie shrunken small white peenie
So rinse spit swallow brain blank kinda hollow
Not to deep leap wow oh kinda shallow
Cause we're in your face like Ed Gein
Purple rain purple rain

Mama say mama sa mama cu sa
Mama say mama sa mama cu sa

Naughty by nature and white by choice
And the sound of my voice makes your panties moist
Cause I'm finger lickin' happy like a gay proctologist
So like a dyke with hollow tits I'll rip the mike with hollow tips
Yeah he's in control like Sherman Potter
And I got more balls then the Harlem Globetrotters
Jimmy Pop Jimmy Pop rah rah rah
Mama say mama sa mama cu sa
Now I'm floating out your pipes like a Village People sump pump
I always take a swallow cause you know I never get enough
So batter up Bruce Banner if you think you're going to measure up
You can't be the top dog gotta be the Scooby Pup
Step to the bass drum always gotta have fun
If you add two halves you'll always get the total sum
My steps are correct and my mike is always checked
And when a punk is in effect you know he's gonna get wrecked
I don't want to start no blasphemous rumors
But I think that Sinbad's got a lousy sense of humor
Little children unattended better get my poison candy
Don't care about y'all as long as we feel dandy
And I get the poon from Judy Blume
Mr Hooper's dead so why don't you give me his broom
So come on chickey baby let's go make some noise
What? No I'm not the guy from the Beastie Boys

Mama say mama sa mama cu sa
Mama say mama sa mama cu sa

Haha, all right Apollo!
Let's hear it one more time for mister, Gary, Coleman!
Whatcha talk about Willis? That joke is funny everytime I hear it!
Let's put your hands together now, Harlem
For, that's right, Harlem
That's right, get up now, Harlem
For The Blood, hound, Gang!

Yo wassup Apollooo
Everybody say "Ho!"
Get off the stage honkie boys...

Ain't my job
To fuck you on your birthday
Ain't my job
To fuck you on your birthday anymore
Ain't my job
To fuck you on your birthday
Ain't my job
To fuck you on your birthday anymore

Maybe you got screwed but i dumped you 'cause you ain't nothin' but trash
I put out despite the fact that you're like a hawaiian punch moustache
Right under my nose thinking i'm so colonel klink oblivious
But how could i nazi(wrong) not see (right) you got off scot-free 'cause i know this means it

Ain't my job
To fuck you on your birthday
Ain't my job
To fuck you on your birthday anymore
Ain't my job
To fuck you on your birthday
Ain't my job
To fuck you on your birthday anymore

If i want to be repeatedly shit on i'll go make dutch porn
When roughly translated even your naked truth means squat and what's more
I'm missing you like a hijacked flight on september 11th
I don't know who got on you but i'm not wrong in thanking them since it

Ain't my job
To fuck you on your birthday
Ain't my job
To fuck you on your birthday anymore
Ain't my job
To fuck you on your birthday
Ain't my job
To fuck you on your birthday anymore

Maybe it ain't your birthday but then again
Ya know i wouldn't give a fuck
When what i shoulda got is over ya sooner so now
I'm just gonna wrap it up

Maybe it ain't your birthday but then again
Ya know i wouldn't give a fuck
When what i shoulda got is over ya sooner so now
I'm just gonna wrap it up

Ain't my job
I'm just gonna wrap it up
To fuck you on your birthday
I'm just gonna wrap it up
Ain't my job
I'm just gonna wrap it up
To fuck you on your birthday anymore
I'm just gonna wrap it up
Ain't my job
I'm just gonna wrap it up
To fuck you on your birthday
I'm just gonna wrap it up
Ain't my job
I'm just gonna wrap it up
To fuck you on your birthday anymore
I'm just gonna wrap it up

Ain't my job
To fuck you on your birthday
Ain't my job
To fuck you on your birthday anymore
Ain't my job
To fuck you on your birthday
Ain't my job
To fuck you on your birthday anymore

Maybe you got screwed but i dumped you 'cause you ain't nothin' but trash
I put out despite the fact that you're like a hawaiian punch moustache
Right under my nose thinking i'm so colonel klink oblivious
But how could i nazi(wrong) not see (right) you got off scot-free 'cause i know this means it

Ain't my job
To fuck you on your birthday
Ain't my job
To fuck you on your birthday anymore
Ain't my job
To fuck you on your birthday
Ain't my job
To fuck you on your birthday anymore

If i want to be repeatedly shit on i'll go make dutch porn
When roughly translated even your naked truth means squat and what's more
I'm missing you like a hijacked flight on september 11th
I don't know who got on you but i'm not wrong in thanking them since it

Ain't my job
To fuck you on your birthday
Ain't my job
To fuck you on your birthday anymore
Ain't my job
To fuck you on your birthday
Ain't my job
To fuck you on your birthday anymore

Maybe it ain't your birthday but then again
Ya know i wouldn't give a fuck
When what i shoulda got is over ya sooner so now
I'm just gonna wrap it up

Maybe it ain't your birthday but then again
Ya know i wouldn't give a fuck
When what i shoulda got is over ya sooner so now
I'm just gonna wrap it up

Ain't my job
I'm just gonna wrap it up
To fuck you on your birthday
I'm just gonna wrap it up
Ain't my job
I'm just gonna wrap it up
To fuck you on your birthday anymore
I'm just gonna wrap it up
Ain't my job
I'm just gonna wrap it up
To fuck you on your birthday
I'm just gonna wrap it up
Ain't my job
I'm just gonna wrap it up
To fuck you on your birthday anymore
I'm just gonna wrap it up

I get bombed much like Pearl Harbor
The price is white right and I'm Bob Barker
This is your brain on drugs
This is your brain on Jackie Onassis
All you crotch goblins can kiss our asses
Yes siree Bob like corn on the cob
I'm all buttered up ready to hob nob
Daddy is a kraut you're Nazi-occupied France
I'm gonna rise to the occasion inside my pants
So yo ass yea you I want to Fraggle Rock your girlie
Coming around the party coming around like Mr. Furley
I'm Mr. Furley you're Jack Tripper
You're dumb ass Gilligan and I'm the Skipper
Tiptoe through my tulips and come and frolic
Cause my name is Betty Ford and she's an alcoholic
So here I am Rock Me Like A Hurricane
Not a Scorpion but my sting will bring your dame a lot of pain
And Daddy's gonna tell ya I'm as cool as Jack The Ripper
Somewhat of a cut-throat but still a big tipper
As I tickle you pink I bet my fingers start to stink
I'm what's missing from your life and you're the missing link
It doesn't matter how you win or lose it's how you lick it....
No rest for the wicked

Get down drink it up bring it on take it off

Flips it up in the air like my name was Bob Barker
I always kicks it cold so I gotta wear my parka
Leaving down my marker stalking like a stalker
Using the Force like my name was Luke Skywalker
Left hand's on the wheel and the right one on the bottle
One foot in the grave and the other on the throttle
I'm floating through your atmosphere like the Comet Haley's
As freaky as a freak show call me Barnum and Bailey
So yo ho my Cheerio here I'm coming around the bend
Don't try to shake my hand I'm not your fucking friend
Bodyslam ya to the ground like I was captain Lou Albano
Hit ya in the balls til you're singing soprano
Slide to the dance floor groove til you get sore
Listen to the tiger's roar I'll pump you like a seesaw
I'm a tattooed demon do you catch my meaning
Think that you're dreaming but soon you'll be screaming
I got more senseless violence than a thriller in Manila
Like my hero Gacy I'm a stone cold killer
Got my moves from Thriller I'm Fish you're Barney Miller
I'm spreading out the carnage like I'm Mechagodzilla
Like Jimmy Pop says he's as cool as Jack The Ripper
So take off your panties and kick off your slippers
Do as i say and I will be a big tipper
More smooth moves than my man Jack Tripper

Get down drink it up bring it on take it off

I get bombed much like Pearl Harbor
The price is white right and I'm Bob Barker
This is your brain on drugs
This is your brain on Jackie Onassis
All you crotch goblins can kiss our asses
Yes siree Bob like corn on the cob
I'm all buttered up ready to hob nob
Daddy is a kraut you're Nazi-occupied France
I'm gonna rise to the occasion inside my pants
So yo ass yea you I want to Fraggle Rock your girlie
Coming around the party coming around like Mr. Furley
I'm Mr. Furley you're Jack Tripper
You're dumb ass Gilligan and I'm the Skipper
Tiptoe through my tulips and come and frolic
Cause my name is Betty Ford and she's an alcoholic
So here I am Rock Me Like A Hurricane
Not a Scorpion but my sting will bring your dame a lot of pain
And Daddy's gonna tell ya I'm as cool as Jack The Ripper
Somewhat of a cut-throat but still a big tipper
As I tickle you pink I bet my fingers start to stink
I'm what's missing from your life and you're the missing link
It doesn't matter how you win or lose it's how you lick it....
No rest for the wicked

Get down drink it up bring it on take it off

Flips it up in the air like my name was Bob Barker
I always kicks it cold so I gotta wear my parka
Leaving down my marker stalking like a stalker
Using the Force like my name was Luke Skywalker
Left hand's on the wheel and the right one on the bottle
One foot in the grave and the other on the throttle
I'm floating through your atmosphere like the Comet Haley's
As freaky as a freak show call me Barnum and Bailey
So yo ho my Cheerio here I'm coming around the bend
Don't try to shake my hand I'm not your fucking friend
Bodyslam ya to the ground like I was captain Lou Albano
Hit ya in the balls til you're singing soprano
Slide to the dance floor groove til you get sore
Listen to the tiger's roar I'll pump you like a seesaw
I'm a tattooed demon do you catch my meaning
Think that you're dreaming but soon you'll be screaming
I got more senseless violence than a thriller in Manila
Like my hero Gacy I'm a stone cold killer
Got my moves from Thriller I'm Fish you're Barney Miller
I'm spreading out the carnage like I'm Mechagodzilla
Like Jimmy Pop says he's as cool as Jack The Ripper
So take off your panties and kick off your slippers
Do as i say and I will be a big tipper
More smooth moves than my man Jack Tripper

Get down drink it up bring it on take it off

Hello Frank,
Hello mother dear
Hi, Jim, what are you doin'
I am trying to think of words that rhyme with vagina
Oh... Lima? Like lima beans
How about that, that teenage witch, Sabrina
No, that's a made up-word, Jim
What if you change the word vagina to something else
Like box or pussy or cunt.
No, Jim........

Hello Frank,
Hello mother dear
Hi, Jim, what are you doin'
I am trying to think of words that rhyme with vagina
Oh... Lima? Like lima beans
How about that, that teenage witch, Sabrina
No, that's a made up-word, Jim
What if you change the word vagina to something else
Like box or pussy or cunt.
No, Jim........

Lift your head up high and blow your brains out

Do you still go to raves?
Do you think that Christ saves?
Do you spend your days in a Purple Haze?
Do you contemplate what a grape nut is?
Or could you live drinkin' your own whiz?
Are you hooked on a feeling are you hooked on gin-n-tonics?
Are you hooked on fistin are you hooked on phonics?
Did you ever have sex with a box of Kleenex?
Did you like the movie Malcolm X?
Or do you own a record by Stryper?
Do you have a mongoloid cousin wearin' diapers?
Were you born and raised in New Jersey?
Did you like the taste of Crystal Pepsi?
Are you deaf?
Well if you are you can't hear me
But what's the use of living if your ear's be?
Broken even if I spoke clearly
You're still not able to hear me
Cause life is a game that no one wins
But you deserve a headstart the way your life's goin'
So throw in the towel cause your life ain't shit
No take that towel and hang yourself with it
Life's short and hard like a body-building elf
So save the planet and kill yourself
If you're feeling down-and-out with what your life's all about
Lift your head up high and blow your brains out
Lift your head up high and blow your brains out
Lift your head up high and blow your brains out
Lift your head up high and blow your brains out

Does your girlfriend look like the chick from M*A*S*H?
Dead ringer for Klinger with a thicker mustache?
When you're at a get-together does everybody always ask?
Ain't no Halloween party why's she wearin' that mask?
Does she got more Chins than the Chinese phone book?
Would you rather make out with a rusty fish hook?
Does she stick to linoleum when she squats?
Does she look pregnant although she's not?
Did you first see your boyfriend on Cops?
Or at a Star Trek convention or on top?
Of your best friend or maybe at Wendy's?
Workin' third shift late New Years' Eve?
Does he live under a bridge scare kids and kill squirrels?
Does he do kegstands until he hurls?
Could a blind man mistake his complexion for Braille
Does he have time to sit around and wait for the mail
Life is a game that no one wins
But you deserve a headstart the way your life's goin'
So throw in the towel cause your life ain't shit
No take that towel and hang yourself with it
Life's short and hard like a body-building elf
So save the planet and kill yourself
If you're feeling down-and-out with what your life's all about
Lift your head up high and blow your brains out
Lift your head up high and blow your brains out
Lift your head up high and blow your brains out
Lift your head up high and blow your brains out

So take your life instead of taking it for granted
I'm thinking you should can it I think I'll help you plan it
Live today like it's gonna be your last
Hang out blow your mind have yourself a gas
I hope you take this the wrong way
And misinterpret what I say
Rewind and let me reverse
Backwards like Judas Priest first did

Vee-moh ra-fee vee-dro yo-brah shneet ni-fuh ih-wahsh oh-fye.

(Reversed)Devil child wake up & eat Chef Boyardee, Beefaroni x4

Cause life is a game that no one wins
But you deserve a headstart the way your life's goin'
So throw in the towel cause your life ain't shit
No take that towel and hang yourself with it
Life's short and hard like a body-building elf
So save the planet and kill yourself
If you're feeling down-and-out with what your life's all about
Lift your head up high and blow your brains out
Lift your head up high and blow your brains out
Lift your head up high and blow your brains out
Lift your head up high and blow your brains out

Jimmy Pop's not a pooper not a pauper but a popper
And I got more pop than Orville Redenbacher
And I got more gravy than the whole Gravy Train
When I'm kooky going loopy like a man insane
I won't be around when the world ends
So the only thing that I'll recycle is your girlfriend
Aww back to the side I jump up I swing
When I'm using Knockem' Sockem' ya know I'm playing it to win
The Nina the Pinta the Santa Maria
See you later salamander cause I wouldn't want to be ya
I'm a chip I'm a Pringle cause you know I gots the flavor
Pop me up in your mouth like I was a Life Saver
Ain't got no soul but I got more than Don Henley
I'm whiter than Casper but I'm not that friendly
Marco Polo you tried to fly solo
Make your thoughts vocal I'll put ya in a choke hold

One way or another I'm gonna find ya I'm gonna getcha getcha getcha getcha
One way or another I'm gonna find ya I'm gonna getcha I'll getcha

I'm a gangster no I'm a gangster bitch
Your momma gave me head your girlie gave me the itch
So scratch it 'til the bass beats fast listen to the shotgun blast
In the oven you'll get burned or in the tank that you'll get gassed
Fake-o like Bacos never mistake though
Showing up painted up fresh from Macco
Now I'm coming in in stereo rounder than a Cheerio
Quick to fill your fix and I'm dizzier than a merry-go
Rock this obnoxious I'm truly not nice
Cause I'm blood sucking evil like Muppets On Ice
Arriba arriba I'm the under achiever
Gonna Leave It To Beaver I'm the Daydream Believer
I'm like Mothra man with my big wingspan
And your the mother fucking Jap that killed my offspring Chan
I'm a Menace To Society I'm gonna fill the prophecy
First I'll drink your Genesee and then I'll take your liberty

One way or another I'm gonna find ya I'm gonna getcha getcha getcha getcha
One way or another I'm gonna find ya I'm gonna getcha I'll getcha

Di Di Mao
You burn village down
You bring family over we all Wang Chung

I'm a tarantula in your Chiquita
And when you're peeling back the skin I'm gonna see ya
I'm gonna bite ya I'm gonna bite ya
I'm Jimmy Pop I'll tell you straight up I don't like ya
Cause I'm cold kicking lyrics till the day I die
Many fail to copy but at least they still try
Busting up vocabulary is what I do most
I'm gonna spread your legs like butter and gobble ya up like toast
You went for the cherry you went bobbing for the apple
But the apple it be rotten and you had to eat the scrappple
Scrapple? Pig meat from a pig pen hog leftovers your girlfriend
So I flex to the effects and I don't care what nobody thinks
I'm eating up your sherbert and dropping all your Tiddiley Winks
Whoops goes my arm I think it's outta socket
Come over little girlie I got some candy in my pocket

One way or another I'm gonna find ya I'm gonna getcha getcha getcha getcha
One way or another I'm gonna find ya I'm gonna getcha I'll getcha

Jimmy Pop's not a pooper not a pauper but a popper
And I got more pop than Orville Redenbacher
And I got more gravy than the whole Gravy Train
When I'm kooky going loopy like a man insane
I won't be around when the world ends
So the only thing that I'll recycle is your girlfriend
Aww back to the side I jump up I swing
When I'm using Knockem' Sockem' ya know I'm playing it to win
The Nina the Pinta the Santa Maria
See you later salamander cause I wouldn't want to be ya
I'm a chip I'm a Pringle cause you know I gots the flavor
Pop me up in your mouth like I was a Life Saver
Ain't got no soul but I got more than Don Henley
I'm whiter than Casper but I'm not that friendly
Marco Polo you tried to fly solo
Make your thoughts vocal I'll put ya in a choke hold

One way or another I'm gonna find ya I'm gonna getcha getcha getcha getcha
One way or another I'm gonna find ya I'm gonna getcha I'll getcha

I'm a gangster no I'm a gangster bitch
Your momma gave me head your girlie gave me the itch
So scratch it 'til the bass beats fast listen to the shotgun blast
In the oven you'll get burned or in the tank that you'll get gassed
Fake-o like Bacos never mistake though
Showing up painted up fresh from Macco
Now I'm coming in in stereo rounder than a Cheerio
Quick to fill your fix and I'm dizzier than a merry-go
Rock this obnoxious I'm truly not nice
Cause I'm blood sucking evil like Muppets On Ice
Arriba arriba I'm the under achiever
Gonna Leave It To Beaver I'm the Daydream Believer
I'm like Mothra man with my big wingspan
And your the mother fucking Jap that killed my offspring Chan
I'm a Menace To Society I'm gonna fill the prophecy
First I'll drink your Genesee and then I'll take your liberty

One way or another I'm gonna find ya I'm gonna getcha getcha getcha getcha
One way or another I'm gonna find ya I'm gonna getcha I'll getcha

Di Di Mao
You burn village down
You bring family over we all Wang Chung

I'm a tarantula in your Chiquita
And when you're peeling back the skin I'm gonna see ya
I'm gonna bite ya I'm gonna bite ya
I'm Jimmy Pop I'll tell you straight up I don't like ya
Cause I'm cold kicking lyrics till the day I die
Many fail to copy but at least they still try
Busting up vocabulary is what I do most
I'm gonna spread your legs like butter and gobble ya up like toast
You went for the cherry you went bobbing for the apple
But the apple it be rotten and you had to eat the scrappple
Scrapple? Pig meat from a pig pen hog leftovers your girlfriend
So I flex to the effects and I don't care what nobody thinks
I'm eating up your sherbert and dropping all your Tiddiley Winks
Whoops goes my arm I think it's outta socket
Come over little girlie I got some candy in my pocket

One way or another I'm gonna find ya I'm gonna getcha getcha getcha getcha
One way or another I'm gonna find ya I'm gonna getcha I'll getcha

Ain't my job
To fuck you on your birthday
Ain't my job
To fuck you on your birthday anymore
Ain't my job
To fuck you on your birthday
Ain't my job
To fuck you on your birthday anymore

Maybe you got screwed but i dumped you 'cause you ain't nothin' but trash
I put out despite the fact that you're like a hawaiian punch moustache
Right under my nose thinking i'm so colonel klink oblivious
But how could i nazi(wrong) not see (right) you got off scot-free 'cause i know this means it

Ain't my job
To fuck you on your birthday
Ain't my job
To fuck you on your birthday anymore
Ain't my job
To fuck you on your birthday
Ain't my job
To fuck you on your birthday anymore

If i want to be repeatedly shit on i'll go make dutch porn
When roughly translated even your naked truth means squat and what's more
I'm missing you like a hijacked flight on september 11th
I don't know who got on you but i'm not wrong in thanking them since it

Ain't my job
To fuck you on your birthday
Ain't my job
To fuck you on your birthday anymore
Ain't my job
To fuck you on your birthday
Ain't my job
To fuck you on your birthday anymore

Maybe it ain't your birthday but then again
Ya know i wouldn't give a fuck
When what i shoulda got is over ya sooner so now
I'm just gonna wrap it up

Maybe it ain't your birthday but then again
Ya know i wouldn't give a fuck
When what i shoulda got is over ya sooner so now
I'm just gonna wrap it up

Ain't my job
I'm just gonna wrap it up
To fuck you on your birthday
I'm just gonna wrap it up
Ain't my job
I'm just gonna wrap it up
To fuck you on your birthday anymore
I'm just gonna wrap it up
Ain't my job
I'm just gonna wrap it up
To fuck you on your birthday
I'm just gonna wrap it up
Ain't my job
I'm just gonna wrap it up
To fuck you on your birthday anymore
I'm just gonna wrap it up